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WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


THIRTY-SIX CARTOONS 


BY 


H. T. WEBSTER 


With Some Unsolicited Advice on 
HOW NOT TO PLAY BRIDGE 


BY 


WILLIAM JOHNSTON 


NEW YORK 
FREDERICK A. STOKES COMPANY 
MCMXXIV 


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Copyright, 1924, by , Saat 
_ Freperick A, SToKEs COMERS 


Copyright, 1921, 1922, by H. T. Weuares 
Copyright, 1923, by PRESS PUBLISHING Co. 


Hames 


All rights ees) 


Published, February 20, 1924 

Second Printing, February 15, 1924 (before 
rd Printing, December 7, 1925 

Fourth Printing, February 3, 1928 


Printed in the United States of America 


FOREWORD 


There have been many books written on how to 
play auction bridge. So far as I know never before 
has there been anything written on “How Not to 
Play Bridge.” | : 

The introduction of the double was a great im- 
_ provement on the game. Mr. Wilbur C. White- 
head’s more recent invention of the informatory — 
negative double was a still greater improvement. 

So I am hoping that what I have here written 
on how not to play bridge will have as much value, 
as what has been written on how to play it. 

In any event Mr. H. T. Webster’s humorous pic- 
tures in this little volume illustrate the evils of play- 
ing bridge badly and the violations of auction eti- 
quette much more vividly and humanly than any 
mere words could do. 

Any bridge player who looks at Webster’s bridge 
pictures will laugh—and learn. 


7 WILLIAM JOHNSTON. 
Knickerbocker W hist Club, 
26 West 4oth Street, New York. 


EDITOR’S NOTE 
BY 
WILBUR C. WHITEHEAD 


Author of “Auction Bridge Standards” and “Auction 
Bridge—Authoritative Leads” 


The more one thinks about it the more it would 
strike one as extremely curious that with so many 
players better qualified to write on “How not to 
play auction,’ my friend William Johnston should 
be the first to do so. 

When he asked me if I would edit this book—he 
has written many, this, however, being his first on 
auction—I was only too happy to do so. To edit a 


_ book, it should be understood, the editor is expected 


merely to go over it carefully, not with the idea of 
picking a quarrel with the author over any of his pet 
theories, but to make sure that he has said what he 
meant to say and not something else. 

Although I may disagree with Mr. Johnston on 
some few of his viewpoints, such as his—in my 
opinion—excessive requirements for original club 
and diamond bids, the fact remains that ‘How 
Not to Play Bridge” is not only amusing but sound 
in its fundamental principles, something that can- 
not be said of many books on the game. And I’ve 
chuckled heartily over Webster’s pictures. 

W. C. WHITEHEAD. 


ae 


CONTENTS 
PAGE 
I. Wuy Do You Pray Bripce?. . . . I 
II]. Wuich Kinp oF A PLAYER ARE You? . 5 
II]. Ir Marrizp To Your PaRTNER . . . 13 
IV. Are You Aa Goop ParTNER? . . . . 19 
Semeenour ORGINAL Bips . . . 2). 6, | 25 
VI. Brwpinc Seconp Hanp Lae yA aceon ig ty wether 
Peto eneouUT THE Luirp HAND ... . . 9. 37 
Wilt PourtH HAND Bippinc . ... . 4! 
MeMNESIDDING OTREAK. . 0 206k ew AS 
Memmreranm OF CLUBS 6 fe i ee i AQ 
XI. Watcu Out For Diamonps . . . ._ 5I 
eee AT NOT TO LEAD...) 0.06 ek 87 
eeebae BUSINESS DOUBLE  . ....00%) .), 67 
MivevaMPORMATORY DOUBLING . .  . (. . °° 93 
eee TIAND-HOG)) che) og 
XVI. Asout THis Luck THING .. . ._ 83 


iv 


XVII. 
XVIII. 
XIX. 
XX, 
XXI. 


CONTENTS 


FREAK HANDS 

Asout SIGNALS . 
TRICKY PLAYERS 

SOME PITFALLS To AvorD 


UNFORGIVABLE SINS 


PAGE 


89 
93 
97 


IOI 


108 


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WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


I 
WHY DO YOU PLAY BRIDGE? 


AUCTION bridge is a game. Games are supposed 
to be played for amusement. If you find that bridge 
irritates you and makes you lose your temper, what 
do you play it for? 

Maybe you took up the game expecting to make 
money at it. Don’t! There are many easier ways 
of getting rich. Horse racing and oil stock are 
much surer. 

But there is a good reason why bridge should be 
played by everybody. It is the one perfect test of 
what constitutes a lady or gentleman. 

Bridge etiquette has no penalties attached to it. 
So your observance of the etiquette of auction is a 
guide to how well-bred you are. 

You're neither a good bridge player nor a perfect 


lady 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


If you fidget or scowl when your partner makes 
a lead you didn’t expect or takes you out of a busi- 
ness double. 


If when you shuffle the cards you fail to put them 


in the right place. 
If you persist in peeping at the cards as they are 


dealt to you. 
If you purposely hesitate before playing a card 


to mislead an opponent. 


If when you are caught revoking you vociferously — 


try to lie out of it. 

If, after the hand is played, you hiladies un- 
asked for and unwelcome advice on how your part- 
ner could have made another trick. 

In fact, if you do any of these things, you shouldn’t 
be allowed to play bridge. There is only one thing 
worse—standing or sitting around a game you are 
not in, and criticizing the various plays. If you do 


nS 


that—well, it’s too bad they gave up burning people — 


alive. Some folks still need it. 

Remember, bridge, like golf, is a game to be 
played, not talked about. 

There’s nothing more boring than to have some 
one tell you in detail how he played a four-trump 
hand day before yesterday. 

Play bridge—don’t talk it. 


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II 


WHICH KIND OF A PLAYER ARE YOU? 
IF you have been playing bridge for any length 


_ of time you will have discovered that there are sev- 


eral different kinds of bad bridge players. Have 
you ever taken the trouble to analyze your own game 
and see which kind of a player you are? 

The six kinds of bad players I have run across 
are 

The Dub—She has an idea that rules are unim- 
portant. “All you have to do to win at bridge is 
to use your common sense,”’ is one of her pet phrases. 
She has heard of the “rule of eleven” but never 
could get it through her head. She is always asking 
what is trump, and pays no attention to her partner’s 
signals. 

She’ll tell you confidentially that Mah Jongg is a 
much better game than bridge. She’s right. For 
her it is. 

It takes brains to make a good bridge player. 

The Gab—She looks upon a bridge game solely 
as an excuse for conversation. Just when you are 


5 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


trying to remember how many trumps have been 
played she begins describing somebody's new gown. 
She starts telling about her latest operation right in 
the middle of the game. She never knows what the 
score is nor whose turn it is to play nor whether 
she is dealing with the red or the blue cards. 

She may get some fun out of the game herself 
but none of the other three players do. 

The Scold—She thinks she was born to rule the 
world and that she knows more about bridge than 
Whitehead, Work and Florence Irwin combined. 
No matter what her partner does, she never is suited 
and scowlingly tells what card in her opinion should 
have been played. 

If she overbids and her partner gets set two tricks — 
doubled, she loses her temper and talks like a fish- 
wife. If she happens to revoke she indignantly de- 
nies it, and if convicted is sure to insist that it was 
dummy’s fault for not asking her about it. 

A player of this type can ruin an otherwise pleas- 
ant afternoon for anybody. | 

The Skin—She’s out to make money out of the 
game. She always wants to play for a bigger stake 
than the rest of the players. She keeps an eagle 
eye on the score and is a martinet at enforcing pen- 
alties. 


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WHICH KIND OF A PLAYER ARE YOU? 


Her favorite pastime is to arrange a set game 
when she has a partner who thoroughly understands 
her game, and their opponents are some beginning 
bridge players. 

Her ambition in life is to make the game pay her 
rent. A partner whose playing causes her to lose 
a few hundred points arouses her enmity. 

If a player of this type had a little more courage 
or a little more capital she’d be running a bucket- 
shop. 

The Brash—He is always over-optimistic. If he 
has no good cards in his own hand, he takes it for 
granted that his partner must have them. 

One of the worst of this sort I ever knew when 
he dealt and discovered that he had a bad hand 
always promptly bid two no-trump. He argued that 
it drove the opponents to three bids and made it 
easier to set them. Generally, however, they would 
double his two no-trump and his innocent partner 
would be set several hundred points. 

Brash players are always doubling the opponents’ 
bids, figuring on two tricks in their partner’s hands. 
Watch out for them. They'll cost you a lot of 
points. 

The No-Bid—There’s nothing worse than having 
an over-confident partner, except having one that is 


7 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


too timid to bid. Once in a while you run across 
players who with three aces and four of the suit 
you have bid, sit still and say “no bid.” When they 
are sure of setting their opponents at least two 
tricks, they are afraid to double. 

You can’t ever win games and rubbers at auction 
unless you bid when you have the cards. A “no-bid” 
partner is ruinous. 


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IF MARRIED TO YOUR PARTNER 


THERE is one peculiar situation that frequently 
arises at the bridge table, which no book on auction 
hitherto issued gives any rules for—that is when 
husband and wife happen to cut each other as part- 
ners. 

No American couple ever has satisfactorily settled 
the question as to which is the better bridge player. 
The battle is renewed each time husbands and wives 
play together. 

If there is no practical way of avoiding having a 
husband and wife play together, these rules should 
be strictly observed: 

A husband, having his wife as a partner, should— 

a. Treat her as politely as he would the cook 
or his stenographer. 

b. Conceal that pained look at a wrong lead 
behind a poker face. 

c. Wait until after the guests are gone to tell his 
wife what he thinks of her. 

13 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


A wife, having her husband as a partner, should— 

a. Remember that letting a man support you 
doesn’t give you the right to insult him. 

b. Be as sweet when your husband makes an 
error in play as you would be to a feminine opponent 
in an afternoon game. 7 

c. Take it for granted that the man you married 
still has as much common sense as when he selected 
you as his wife. 

Harsh as these rules may seem, anyone who ever 
has played bridge against a husband and wife will 
realize the importance and necessity of them. 


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IV 


ARE YOU A GOOD PARTNER? 


BRIDGE is essentially a partnership game. You 
may play your best but if you have a partner that 
always throws you, you will lose a lot of points. 

In bridge the greatest asset you can possibly have 
is a thoroughly dependable partner. 

The qualifications of a good partner are :— 

You can bank on his original bids. If he says 
“fone diamond”. you can rely on his being able to 
take two tricks if you lead him that suit. 

If you bid two spades over a no trump you can 
be sure that his first lead will be his highest spade 
if he has two, or a little one if he has three or 
four to an honor. 

You can depend on a good partner never to make 
original bids on king-jack suits, never to bid “two 
hearts” as an original bid when he has six or seven 
to the queen. 

A good partner always heeds your signals and 
leads you the suit you call for at the first oppor- 
tunity. 

19 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE | 


If he bids an original no trump, you may know 


that he has as good as three aces or af least three 


suits amply stopped. a 
If you have a dependable partner and he makes 


a shut-out bid of four spades, you need not worry 


even if you haven’t a spade in your hand. © 


Dependable partners, however, rarely make shut- ae 


out bids in either clubs or diamonds, unless well able _ 
to go game with average help or Jess from partner. 
What’s the use? | 


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ABOUT ORIGINAL BIDS 


IF you want to be a good bridge player, the first 
thing to do each morning when you get up is to 
look at yourself in the glass and say aloud :— 

“What is the purpose of making an original bid?” 

If you ask yourself this question often enough 
you will presently come to realize that there is only 
one correct answer to this question—divided into 
two parts. 

First—I make an original bid because I believe 
that with average help from my partner I can make 
my contract, and possibly go game. 

Second—While this hand is not strong enough 
in itself to go game I want my partner to know that 
if he leads me the suit I mention I can in all prob- 
ability take at least two tricks. 

Frequently you will find a poor player who will 
make a weak original bid and then attempt to 
defend it by saying— 

“Partner, I was trying to save game.”’ That’s 
tommyrot. You can’t expect to win every game of 
bridge. If you have a bad hand, take your medi- 


25 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


cine and be hopeful that the next deal will bring — 


you some aces and kings. 

Over-bidding a weak hand only deceives your 
partner and is apt to get you set, and make you lose 
several hundred points on the rubber. 

When you have finished dealing, study your hand 
to see whether it is an offensive or a defensive hand. 
Consider what may happen if you bid a heart or a 
spade and the other side doubles. 

Unless you see a chance to go game, give your 
partner whatever reliable information you can, then 
sit back and wait to see what happens. 

Don’t ever, when you are dealer, bid initially a 
long suit without the tops, unless it is backed up 
heavily with aces and kings of other suits. Unless 
your partner has a bid, you can’t do much with it 
anyhow. Suppose you have six spades to the queen, 
if he bids no trump you have an ideal “take out.” 
If he indicates that he has some sure tricks in clubs 
or diamonds, bid your six spades to the queen on the 
second round, if you have an outside trick to back 
them up or are blank in the suit he mentioned. 

And one thing more—don’t ever bid no trump 
if you can make an honest bid of a major suit. 

‘“‘No trumps” are the hardest to make. Never bid 
them if you can bid a major suit legitimately. 


26 


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VI 


BIDDING SECOND HAND 


THERE are many fairly good bridge players who 
fail to recognize what a wonderfully strategic posi- 
tion the second hand is. 

Suppose the dealer bids “no trump,” and the 
second hand sits there with six spades or six hearts 
to the ace-king. Many foolish players rush right in 
and bid the suit, but it is a great mistake. As likely 
as not their partner will be blank in that suit and 
they will go down a trick or two. 

What if there is no other bidding and the dealer 
plays his no trump. If second hand opens his long 
suit there is little likelihood of the dealer going 
game. You stand a good chance of taking five or 
six tricks, and, if your partner has anything at all, 
of setting your opponents a trick or two. 

What if the dealer’s partner bids two in one of 
the minor suits. There’s still plenty of time to men- 
tion your spades or hearts without increasing the 
contract. 


31 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


Or suppose your own partner mentions a minor © 
suit. That will give you all the more confidence 
in bidding on the second round if you know your 
partner has something. 

But if you are second hand and decide to bid, © 
make sure that in addition to the suit you bid you 
have what is known as a “get in,’—an ace, or a 
king-queen in another suit, so that in case the other 
side go on with their no-trump, and you fail to estab- 
lish your suit on the first two or three rounds, you 
can get back in and lead it again. 

Second-hand, too, is a favorite position for 
doubling, but we’ll talk about that later. So many 
people double these days without having genuine 
doubles that the subject needs a chapter or two all 
by itself. 


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ABOUT THE THIRD HAND 


Many hours spent over the bridge table have 
convinced me that the chief function of third-hand 
is to “‘take out” the dealer of whatever he has bid. 

If the dealer bids no-trump, I have found that it 
pays to take him out under these circumstances: 

Whenever I have a singleton of any suit. 

Whenever I have five of a major suit or six of a 
minor to a high honor. 

Of course there come times when third hand will 
hold a regular Yarborough without a single trick 
in it, and the only thing to be done then is to keep 
quiet. Any bid you make under those circumstances 


‘increases the contract, deceives your partner and 


doubles the likelihood of getting set. 

There are some bridge authorities these days who 
oppose the take-out in spades or hearts, unless you 
have enough honors to have warranted an originai 
bid. Personally I do not agree with them. 

Most players these days are bidding an original 
no trump on rather weak cards. If you are third 


37 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


hand with five spades or hearts, take them out and 
make sure they mean it. If they go back to no 
trump, despite your warning that you'd rather play 
a major suit, it’s up to them. 

But make it your invariable rule to take out on 
something if you have a singleton, unless such take- 
out would deceive your partner and leave him in 
worse shape than if you said nothing. Most people 
bid an original no-trump on three suits well-stopped. 
If you have a singleton, that may be the very suit in 
which they, too, are shy. Second-hand very likely 
is sitting back, with seven of them to the ace-king- 
queen, gleefully waiting to set you. 

But no rule can be absolute. Sometimes when 
your partner bids no-trump you have a lot of aces 
and kings yourself. Use your common sense ~ 
then, and try to figure out what he has in his hand 
to warrant a bid. Sometimes under those circum- 
stances, you can take a chance of leaving him in, even 
if you have a singleton in some suit. 


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OH, MR, FOSKETT, t 


PLAY So Foorty! 
tp BE SCARED 


PLAYIN 


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You Uke To MAKE A 


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GEORGE A 
IMAEInE! 


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-HA-A-A 
SHE CALLED 


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FEV S ae? 


HA-HA 
DON'T YOu 
SHARK 


Vill 


FOURTH HAND BIDDING 


THE fourth hand in the deal is no place for an 
optimist. 

There’s one maxim that every bridge player ought 
to keep constantly before him in big letters, and say 
it aloud three times a week. Here it is: 

Never start the bidding fourth hand unless with 
no more than average help from partner you are 
certain you can go game. 

To bid at all you ought to be two sure tricks 
stronger than you would need to for an original bid 
by dealer. 

Your partner, by not bidding, has already told 
you he has nothing in his hand worth mentioning. 

And if you are going to make an original bid 
fourth hand, by all means bid a suit, if you can, 
rather than a no-trump. 

Consider, before you bid, what is going to happen 
if one of your opponents doubles for a bid. Is there 
any suit they could go to, that would leave i 
in a hole. 


41 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


Generally when three hands have made no bid, 


the cards are so distributed that game is not ee i 


for anyone. 

Fourth hand is a bad place to double a Nealon S 
no-trump, too. If he goes two no-trump, all you 
have done is to give him information as to where 
the strong cards lie. 

The best advice that can be given about fourth- 
hand bidding can be summed up in a slight para- 
phrase of a famous political saying: 

Step softly OR carry a big stick! 


SSS 


: spp s LZ. ss 


WOO MMM ANA 


NANA 
\ 
MANY 


rH 
WN 


THE Commu TER. HAS TAKEN 
A THROUGH TRAIN “To HIS 


NILLAGE. WHILE WALKING 
Down THE PLATFOR™- HE 


GLANCES AT THE WINDow 
OF A DRAWING ROOM AnD 
RECALLS THAT THis VERY 
EVENING HE 15 SCHEDULED 
To PLAY BRIDGE WITH His CERES 
WIFE AND Two MAIDEN ZEEE 
LADIES AT 254A CORNER. y 


IX 


A BIDDING STREAK 


EVERY once in a while players, even fairly good 
players, get what is known as a bidding streak. 

Time after time they will overbid their hands, 
each time getting set. [he higher the score gets 
to be against them, the more desperately they will 
bid, trying vainly to win the rubber. 

So far as I am aware, no successful way has ever 
been discovered of curing partners of these terrible 
bidding streaks. 

All a partner can do under such circumstances is 
keep his temper if he can, and keep quiet even when 
he has aces and king strength in his own hand. 

If you give a man in a bidding streak the slight- 
est encouragement he goes mad. He immediately 
imagines that you must have all the aces in the 
pack. 

If your opponents have made a spade bid, and it 
has been doubled, and you, being blank in spades 
bid on six clubs to the queen, to deny spades, a part- 

45 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


ner in a bidding streak is just as likely to carry you 
to four clubs. The fact that clubs is the cheapest 
suit means nothing, you can go down as many points 
in clubs as you can in spades. 

Make a practice of studying the kind of bidding 
your partners do. When you find a dependable 
partner, sing a hymn of thanksgiving. 

If you get hooked up with a partner addicted to 
bidding streaks, the best advice I know is to take a 
correspondence course in temper control. 

They’re terrible—and incurable. 


Wes, BuT | DIONT Y( IF You HAs. (1 WAS Meo OF 
MAKE A FREE Bi0, Lamas lain PLAYING My MINOR 
mine WAS A IEMULTIMATE | / TENACE INSTEAD 
OU WW 
BECAMDARY 10. ()anee ance / (oe MATOR 


{ SHOULD THINK 
You WOULD pteo st ’ 
ADE A PRE-EMeCTINE 
o10 witht THAT 
HAND. tT WAS 
ALMOST A 
PIANOLA 


aN 


SS 
SS 


oy 
WS 


SLES, 


t 

, 

Z 

Zz 
WY 
'‘t 
y 

/ 

Y 


You MAY MOT BELIEVE No TE — THE 
7 BuT LAST WEEK t DEFINITION OF 
HELO A YARBOROUGH — Be aie cast 
See Pa are Amo WrHiced 
THREE TIMES IN ONE” CONTAINS NO CARD 
HIGHER THAN Nine 


N 
NN 


—_ 


Wass 
SSS 
—-) 


A 


—— 


xX 


BEWARE OF THE CLUBS 


THERE are four suits in each pack of cards, and 
the most dangerous suit of all is clubs. 

If you try to make a game in clubs you have to 
take five tricks, and then it only counts thirty. 

On the other hand, if you get set in three clubs 
doubled it costs you just as much as if you had been 
spades or no trump. 

If you are the dealer and find five clubs to the 
ace-king in your hand and nothing else, don’t men- 
tionthem. They’re worth mighty little to you unless 
you have another ace or a king-queen in your hand. 
Then you can cautiously say “‘one club,’”’ hoping your 


partner may want to try a no-trump. 


If dealing and you find six clubs to the king-jack, 
even if you have a trick in some other suit, sit still 
and wait. 

Never, never, never bid a king-jack suit of any 
sort as an opening bid, no matter what its length. 

Generally you’ll get a chance to bid them later, 
and if you don’t you probably are lucky that you 


didn’t get a chance to make the bid. 


49 


—— 


; = y Nils Al i | o/ 

f} l S| f d 
\S 4 i} 

A 7 ifs A 

(Sf f \ N\A G 


RS 


| Guess I've 
ECT ENOUGH 
Books To LAST 
me THROUGH 
THE EVENING 


Pa) t ie) 
oF £ 2 
WU 9 
Z><Ouu 
WLIZ FP 
Troyer 
Yk GD by 
tz wu 
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Ano EnouGeH 
To BACCO 


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? 


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WASN'T DOING A THING - 


Just READING. 
You VE GoT 


Fine! SAME CLO 


| iad Swill 


XI 


WATCH OUT FOR DIAMONDS 


DIAMONDS, like clubs, are more to be talked about 
than played. 

It seldom pays to make a diamond bid, expecting 
to play them, unless you are something on the 
score. 

Never bid diamonds or any other suit originally 
unless you have the tops of the suit. ' 

Even if you read in a bridge book that ‘‘with six 
diamonds in your hand to the queen-jack, you should 
make an original bid of two diamonds,” don’t you 
believe it. 

They quit doing that about the time that nullos 
were born and died. 

Be mighty careful, too, about attempting a shut- 
out bid in diamonds even if you have seven or eight 
of them with four honors solid. If all the diamonds 
are bunched in your hands, it means that somebody — 
else has the spades and hearts. Very likely it is 
your opponents. 

51 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


Suppose you bid four diamonds right off. What 
are you going to do if the other side goes four hearts 
or four spades? Always look before you leap into 
a shut-out bid. 

Diamond honors are useful in helping your part- 
ner make a no-trump bid. The ace and king of 
diamonds generally each take a trick. 

But many a woman has lost many a rubber 
because she couldn’t resist the temptation to keep on 
bidding diamonds or clubs. 


OH, CHestee, 1m SO Gtao 
YoUNE GIVEN UP THAT HoRRIO 
Foxer Game! SO CENT LIMIT . 
_\ WAS TOO MUCH LIKE GAMBLING. 
HBX You CAN’ T AFFORD IT. Now, 
JA YOuR tiv Tce BRIOGE GAME 
AT S CEnrs A Point Is 
REASONABLE ~ You Quit EARty 
ANO You CANT Losé GuTA Few CENTS. 
rs A GENTLEMAN'S PASTIME 
Not A Low GAMBLING GAME 


= SS 


SSS 
' j . al HEINE 
if, tev = ~ \ i) x 
eee Yh \) yl} 
X I \ - 
Syl) 


y 
Vy 
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CHESTER HAS usr \ 
BEEN HOOKED FoR. 

=\ 29,00 IN AUCTION 

; ENTS A FOINTt eam 
AE OS Eid ilnlgs TONLE AYA AALERRAONA LR 


ceases 


t SEE WHERE TH PRESIDENT'S — ge 
WELL, How ARE YOU MARGE. ANO ! ARE 
WIFE 1S Quite Domestic~ 6%, Pena 4 ian he pees BASS nee ok 
DARMS HER HUSBANDS I\ Aerennoon ? Be Gerd iy hala 

* ) GRACES AND: PLAY A FEW 


» 
CKS An’ SEWS ON HS ‘ < | OBBER SOF BRWGE, I'L Ff 
é BE Home 


BYFH WAY, 1 NOTICE 

A COUPLA BUT Tors 

MISSING FRom HS 
SUIT OF UNCER WEAR. 


JUSSA MINUTE BEFORE ] | WELL, Foe HEAVEN 5 Saes wey Don't You FT 


ON ANOTHER PAIR 7 15 THAT ALL YOU HAVE 7 
AMYONE WOULD Titi YOU 
Owne 0 ONE 


You Go -LOooK ATF 


XII 


WHAT NOT TO LEAD 


ANYBODY who plays bridge at all these days ought 
not to have much difficulty in knowing which cards 
to lead. The leads have become pretty well stand- 
ardized, and if you don’t wish to have your partner 
“talk at you” for leading the wrong card, all that is 
necessary for you to do is to go to any book store 
and buy a Whitehead’s ‘‘Authoritative Leads.”’ 

What not to lead is infinitely more important, but 
there has been very little written about it. There 
are few bridge players whose game will not be 
helped by avoiding some of the ‘“‘worst leads” that 


follow: 


Never lead away from an ace. Did you ever stop 
to ask yourself what good such a foolish lead does 
anybody? Yjour opponent, looking at dummy and 
his own hand, knows that he hasn’t it. Your partner 
knows he hasn’t it. As you haven’t led it, and it isn’t 
in dummy, he takes it for granted your opponent 
must have it. Your partner is the only person you 


57 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


are fooling. And frequently when you underlead, 
or lead away from an ace, you never do get a chance 
to make it. By the time you get around to playing it 
somebody may trump it. 

This of course applied only when you are playing 
a suit. In no-trump you generally underlead an ace, 
if you are lucky enough to have one. If in a trump 
declaration you’ve got ace and one, it sometimes 
pays to lead out your ace, but generally it is better 
to lead another suit. 

Beware of the doubleton lead. Nothing is more 
annoying or confusing to a partner than to have you 
lead him the top card of a doubleton. He tries to 
count up from the pips on the card to see what you 
are leading from and gives it up. He decides it 
must have been a singleton. He returns your lead 
expecting you to trump it, and instead your opponent 
gets in and goes game before you can stop him. Not 
only do you lose the game, but your partner thinks 
a lot of hard things about you, and sometimes he 
says them right to your face. 

Be careful about singletons. The singleton lead 
is coming more and more into disfavor. Sometimes 
it is profitable, but the objection to it is, that right 
away it enables your opponent to place all the cards 
in that suit. The longer you can keep an opponent 

58 


SUPPOSE You ASK CLARA WHAFM ? 

Mo - CLARA'S ONE OF THESE 

PLAYERS WHo TRIES To PLAY EVERY 

HANO. SHE'S IMPOSSIBLE. *™ 

SuReE NANCY woutgon'T CARE 
To MEET HER 


Amy BATHMATTE MIGHT — No - Amy 
Bios FoveTH HANNO WHEN SHE HAS 
Onry Two SURE TRICKS. 3 WoOULON'T 
INSULT MANCY BY INVITING A 
womaAm oF THAT CHARACTER 


You MIGHT ASK MALDE HooPLAats- 
Mo - 1M WRONG!.MAUDE SATS— 
“yunSH 1 Couto RE-DOUBLE 
AGAIN > You CovLDeT ASK 
Nancy To CLAY WITH A WOMA™ 


wHo DoEsS THAT 


Peeuars HELEM KooKoO — NO- 
rt FORGETS RETURN HER 
e°S LEAD AND THE DISCARDS} 


Here 
PAR TNE 
MEA MOTHING IN HER. Youn G LIFE. 
1 SHOULON T ASK HER TH Meet 
Amyome « REALLY CARED ABOUT 


PARTy. W 
QUIVVERING Soutcs - 
“He “THREE OF US 


WHAT NOT TO LEAD 


guessing about where the cards are the more likely 
you are to defeat him. 

Lead your partner’s suit. Many players sitting 
on the second hand of the dealer, have an annoying 
habit of trying to establish their own suit instead 
of leading the one their partner has bid. This is 
especially true if the dealer has bid two no-trump 
over a fourth-hand suit bid. 

Remember, the reason your partner bid was be- 
cause he wanted and expected you to lead him what 
he called for. The dealer may have the suit stopped 
once, or possibly twice, but if it is led, the chances 
are your partner has “‘get-in’ cards enough to 
establish it eventually. 

Of course if you have a set-up suit in your own 
hand against a two-no trumper, that is six or seven 
to the ace-king-queen, jump right in and lead them 
first, but unless you have, lead what your partner 
asked you to. 

Why take a plunge in the dark? If you lead your 
own weak suit, instead of his, very likely you are 
headed for disaster. Be nice to your partner and 
do what he asks you to. 

It used to be the practice when leading to your 
partner a suit that he called for, invariably to lead 
him the highest of his suit that you happened to have 

61 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


in your hand. Recently it has been discovered by 
the experts that it generally works out better, if you 
have three or four of his suit to an honor, to lead 
him the lowest, and let him lead it back to you. 
This is especially advisable in playing against a 
no-trump declaration. 

And last of all, and this is primer class stuff, 

Don’t lead out all your aces and kings right off the 
reel. They are valuable “key cards.’’ As long as 
you have them in your hand, you have a wonderful 
control. The sooner your opponent finds out where 
the aces and kings are, the better he can plan his 
game. 


OH,1Ss aT MY LEAD? - 
1 BEG Your FARDor! 


t THOUGHT tT WAS —~} 


YES, YOURE RIGHT - 
rs My LEAD. HM- 
Mm-m— 


YES, 17's 


Your , 
LEAO. 


AH-H - DJUusSTA 
MinuTE , NOW — — 


HM-m- LES SEE 
NOw - UH - NO, 
THAT Wor’v DO-- 
HM-M- WELL, NOW, 
Aw — 


THAT WAS AN AWFULLY 
Comcar MuevEer HAT 
TOOK PLACE AT THE 


WHIST CLUB LAST NIGHT, AL. 


A MAN SHOT Dowm Like 
A 00G FoR BEING 50 
Slow in PLAYING 


“lle 


Hm-m! Deacer B19 
A SPADE ANO EVERYONE 
PASSED. HM! AND It’s 
My LEAD ISNT IT Kj 
WELL, Now, LEMME 


LOOK THIS OVER A 
MimvTe - HM-™ 


YEAH THAT WAS ONE OF ys 


+ Tue’ FUNNIEST 


MURDERS 1 EVER 
HEARD OF, "vE BEEN 
Q LAUGHING EVER Since 
~ | READ ABOUT (tT 


Y 


ANAS 
S RSSeAs— awn 


dice, g 


TRY AND PLAY A SANE GAME OF BRIDGE 
To-miGHT ! BE CONSERVATIVE 1h YouR 
BIDDING! WHEN You B10 CounT THE 

i TRICKS YOU ARE GOING To tose! 

THe BROWNS ARE EXPERT PLAYERS - 

REMEMBER THAT 


t ADO A DIGGER, 
OF PINEAPPLE JUICE. 
HELPS ALOT 


NONSENSE | . MoO! No: Bice 
Ive HAD FINE {VE HAD Four 
mM secur! rior ALREAoy! WHuP! 
SHAKE UP SOME Tua’s PLENTY! 
MORE*N A 

MInuTEe 


HERE'S ‘To 
ceime ! 


tus SAY SIX SPADES! waa ya 
THimte OF THAT 7 AN’) HAVEN'T 
MuCH OF A HANO EITHER -= 


XIII 


THE BUSINESS DOUBLE 


More rubbers at auction have probably been lost 
by foolish doubles than for any other cause. 

Doubling is trying to outguess the fellow who is 
doing the bidding, and the chances are he is-as good 
a guesser as you are. Besides the bidder always has 
the advantage of you. He knows what he has in his 
hand and you don’t. 

Suppose he has bid three spades. Yov’re sitting 
there with the ace of spades, the ace-king of hearts 
and the ace-king of diamonds. Your partner has 
put in a club bid. You count up the sure tricks in 
your own hand, five, and consider that your partner 
having made a bid has probably a trick or two in 
clubs. It looks safe, so you confidently announce 
“T double.” 

But wait a minute. STOP and THINK. Why 
did the bidder go to three spades, when he didn’t 
even have the ace? The chances are he has seven 
or eight spades, and no diamonds whatever. That 


67 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


ace and king of diamonds that you counted as sure 
tricks turn out to be just mere decorations. And 
your partner, it turns out, was bidding on six clubs 
to the queen-jack. 

Frequently in just such cases as this the bidder 
makes his contract doubled, with sometimes an extra 
trick or two. 

So here’s a rule you will not find in any bridge 
book, but it’s a good one: 

Before announcing a business double, try to put 
yourself in the other fellow’s place. 

Try to picture his hand to see if you can con- 
jecture what the situation is that makes him bid so 
confidently. And keep in mind that though “chicane” 
doesn’t count any more in the score, it frequently 
doubles the strength of a hand. 

Another thing about business doubles—be careful 
whom you double. 

Some players are conservative, always making 
sound bids. Beware of doubling them, they’re apt 
to make it. 

But there are players who try to combine poker 
and bridge, who are always flag-flying and game- 
saving—they’re the ones that it pays to double. 

But be cautious about doubling when the bidding 
gets up to five or six. That always means that there 

68 


7% -* a le 


YES (nNUDEED. 
WE HAVE A LITTLE 
CvLUB IN OUR TOWN 
AND ! PLAY EVERY 
SATURDAY. My WIFE 
SAYS VM A SHARK 

AT tT BuT _ 


You Puay 
BR:0GE OF 
Course 7? 


<THE KING, JACK tO ANO 7 OF SVADE S. 

Ye HOLOS THE 8 AND 7 OF HEARTS, THE ACE, 

G ANO 2 OF CLUBS AN0O THE QUEEN, 8 ANOS 
OF SPADES. DHOLDS THE FAND 3 OF CLUBS, 
THE (0, 7 ANO 5 OF DIAMONDS AND THE 
ACE ,5 AND 2 OF STADES. THERE ARE 


No TRUMPS AND Z LEADS THE 10 OF 
DIAMONDS — 


a AND Fortes THe ACE OF SPADES, GIVING A.A CLus 
OR A HEART OR B 2 SPADES. = LEAOS THE 
SMALL SPADE , Bins FT. Z WINS THE NEXT 


ATRICK AND A HAS] DISCARD, Giuinc¥ 2 
\ Teicks, 1& &B OOESN'T LEAD THE 322 DIAMOND 


-Y Amd Z MUST MAKE 2 SPAUES, A CLUB AND A 
PIAMOND — ETC.,ETC ETC. 


THEN You'Lt APPRECIATE THIS HAND 
1 WATCHED THE OTHER NIGHT AT my CLUB. 
WE'LL CALL THE PLAYERS A,B, WANOZ. 
A HOLOS THE QUEEN, G AND 9 OF HEARTS, 
THE KING,QUEEN AND 7 OF CLUBS THE 8 OF 
DIAMONDS AND THE ¥oF SPADES. GB HOLOS 
THE (0 OF CLUGS, THE QUEEN, GAND 3 OF 
DIAMOonNOS, —— 


- ANDO Y DISCARDS THE 80F SPADES. NO OTHER 
OPENING AND NO OTHER DISCARD WOULD DO, 

IF ¥ DISCARDS THE G OF SPADES B AUoWS THE 
10 OF DIAMONDS TH HOLD, WHICH FORCES Z To 
SUE T To CLUBS AND FORCES ¥ To LET:6 Win WH 
THE 10, THe QUEEN AND ANOTHER DIAMOND 
THROWS Z BACK INTO THE LEAD. WHEN Z 
LEAOS THE SPADE ,B INS WHATEVER Yf PLAYS5/. 


THANKS. 
lt Don'T PLAY 
Tt Game! | 


HELLO, Tim! WERE 
LOOKING For A FouRTeH 
AT BRIDGE. How 
ABourr You 7 


is a freak distribution BF cards. The ACES | 


DON’T. 


WHo’s “THts ? ARTHUR RacHe ? Nore! 
No POKER FoR ME ,ART, WILD HORSES 

CouLon T DRAG ME ANTO A CARDO GAME 
Om A HOT MIGHT LiKe Tes ! 


Wrew! some Heat! Me-ror TH LIL 
OL SHOWER WHEN 1 GET Home, tie 
SLIP ON My THiIm SILK PYJAMAS Am 
Sit On TH BACK PoRCH ALL EVENING. 
WE ALWAYS GET A BREEZE THERE 


LiKe Ce 


IMAGINE PLAYIN CARDS 1M THIS HOT 
WEATHER! ART SuRE DOES LOVE 


SAY, Bitt, RAY LONG 5 
GONNA HAVE A Liv Tee 
GAME To-miIGHT AN -—— 


’ 
NoT FoR ME. 
MoT tn THIS 
weaTuer 


LLL 
ZZ og, 


WE'RE GOING TD THe ANDERToONS” 
BRIDGE PARTY To-NIGHT, DEAR, 
AND You JusT HAVE Time To 

GET DRESSED. THE STUDS ARE 
ALL Im YOuR SHIRT 


XIV 


INFORMATORY DOUBLING 


THERE have been a lot of nasty looks exchanged 
over the bridge table since the informatory double 
was invented. Most of them come through one 
or the other of the partners lacking intelligence or 
application enough to master.a very simple rule. 

Every person who pretends to be a bridge player 
should know— 

*“When a bid of one, two or three is doubled at 
the first opportunity, the doubler’s -partner, not 
having made a bid, MUST take him out in his 
longest suit.”’ 

Unless you are absolutely positive and then some 


that you can surely defeat the bidder, you must bid 


your longest suit, even if it’s only four to the seven 
of diamonds. If the bidder has said hearts and 
your only four-card suit is hearts, then you must 
say “no trump.” You’ve just got to do something 
or say something to give your partner a chance to 
name his suit. 

If you have hearts stopped, probably that was 

73 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


all he wanted to know. If you name a suit in which 
he is blank, he can name his longest suit, and then 
it’s up to him to struggle out the best he can. At any 
rate, your partner can’t blame what happens on you. 
You have done what he asked you to. | 

One reason that fights start over the informatory 
double is that many persons double on too weak a 
hand. They don’t stop to look before they leap into 
a double. 

An informatory double is supposed to be a call 
for a partner’s longest major suit. Suppose the 
partner has length only in clubs and diamonds. 
Before doubling, try to picture what cards are likely 
to be in your partner’s hand. The bidder has given 
you an idea of what he holds by his bid. You know 
what is in your own hand. If it was your partner’s 
deal and he passed, the chances are he hasn’t much 
of anything. 

So don’t make an informatory double without 
having something more than the equivalent of two 
aces, without having both major suits well-stopped, 
and without considering what will happen if your 
partner is forced to bid a minor suit. 

Weak informatory doubles frequently lead to 
settings. When you double you tell your opponents 
where the strength lies and gives them an advantage. 

74 


WHY, HP THOUGHT fO Go 
OUT FOR A LITTLE STRoLL- 
MAYGE DROP tn TH” CLUG 

An’ PLAY A LITTLE BRIOGE 


© mat 
e 
ew &* 


af 


Do You. THis 1 ENToy SITT 
HERE ALONE a vATION. 
NIGHT LOOKING AT Four. 


wry, GERTIE, t TrOn'T Think You 
MINDEO STAYING HOME ALONE 
Burt tf THATS THE WAY You FEEL 
ABOLT tr $s WortT GO OUT, FLt 
STAY RIGHT HERE wie You 


=. 


DIO rv EVER OCCUR To You 
Thar f MIGHT LIKE To Go 


OuT SOME EVERANG ? 


| HAVEN'T SEEN A MovtE Itt | 
TWo WEEKS! You Don TSEEM 
"lo CARE How Lonesome ANDO 
DULL tT 13 FOR MES THERES A 
Good CicTuREe AT THe Queer 


“To Mt(GH T ~:* 


A tN 


my rr /A 


HO-tHum $ THined PLOTORe IN, 
tf You StT GP AMO READ | HOPE 
YouLt BE AS QuieT AS FossiGLe 
AND NOT KEEP ME AWAKE, 
Goo’ nrenT! 


| Ver often, fe you dae bets et 
done you would defeat the bid. ee 


THE FEEBLE 
SARCASO4 mma, imMay BE WRONG & 
Bur 1 Am LABORING 
hdindcephahiehincsacinncnigetioemacgeeee ee ee | 


ATILOCLOCIKK LAST 
NIGHT — 8 ANOS 


AS 
WHY, ‘ 
MAME, DIDN'T You _ {ll 
Give me Your. ~*~ \("°° 
LONGEsT Suit? . - 


YF Ey PLAINED Att Agour }' 


IT BEFORE We LEFT ) 
THE. House AND EWAS © 


has le 


= 


if V6 7 té 


Sj 


Sy 


LAVAS TVA 
j SSS 


THE BEAUTY OF THE GAMEMS. 
You CAN CONTINUE PLAYING IT 
om vVAYS -—- 


XV 


THE HAND-HOG 


ONE of the most unpleasant animals ever encoun- 
tered in the bridge game is the hand-hog. 

Generally you can recognize him by the defiant 
gleam in his eye as he picks up his cards. You can 
see that he is determined to play every hand, no 
matter how good cards his partner holds. 

You bid one spade. He goes two clubs. You 
haven’t a club in your hand, and have four honors 
in spades to six and an outside ace. Of course you 
bid two spades. He goes three clubs. You go three 
spades. He gives his chair a hitch, closes his lips 
tightly, gives you a defiant look, and bids four 
clubs. 

Duty to yourself, to your knowledge of the game, 
to your precious four-spade honors, to your certainty 
of going game, demands that you bid four spades. 
He gives you another angry look of warning and 
shouts “FIVE CLUBS” and in despair you let him 
have it. Generally, with the help of your wonderful 


79 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


hand, he manages to just make game, and preens 
himself over it. Sometimes he gets set. 

The worst part of it is: the hand-hog is often 
your own husband. 

Some husbands, otherwise respectable, good pro- 
viders, willing to put on Tuxedos without grumbling, 
when they have their wives for partners, simply will 
not allow the poor women to play a hand if they 
can help it. 

There’s no cure for a hand-hog except going to 
Reno. 

The only way to endure them is to sit tight, and 
never tell them if you have all the aces and kings 
in your hand. No matter what you hold, a hand-hog 
will not let you do the playing. 

If you find you are married to a hand-hog, don’t 
play cards with him. If you are not married to him, 
don’t ever play cards with him again. 

Hand-hogs are not only unpleasant partners, but 
expensive luxuries. 


es 


ee eT 


—" 


VAKItMEE HOw-ooH 
CHOw MEELEE Foo 
Yon G FyTee ToEy 
TonG Gola Foo Ey 

FLIED FLEESH | 
CHONG KEENO 
LICHEE OOLONG 
CHOW Mares § 


WHITEHEAD SAYS > 
“IFTHE PLAYER 
DOuBLE 5 NEGATWWELY 
Ant AOVERSE NO-Trume 
Bio ANO PARTNERS 
Woard You Mino CARO S WARRANT THE 


N 1G PRE SUMPTION THAT, 
oo, IF DOUBLE IS TAKEN 


OUT WITH Two NO -Teumes, 
1 DOUBLER ANDO PARTNER 


CAN MAKE Woe No-Teumes 


ANO, THEREFORE IF LEFT 
InN OPPONENTS CAN 
BE PENALIZED 200 

PoinTrs — 


itt? 


MR.FANG SAYS ' 
1 You Evér Visi MIRACULOUS: 
HONG KONG You 1, 00N'T SEE 
MUST PLAN TO tow You 0o 
Visit HIM FoR. rr! 
ATLEAST A 
MonTtH 


BY DOING THAT WE 
WERE PENALIZED 300 f 
POINTS. IF You HAD 
DOUBLED MAU0E'S BID 
LESs THAN OF Two HEARTS AND AF 
theurct 1 | Mavde HAD BO 3 
TRIcK$ SO HEART S TO SHUT OUT, | Teirtk You 
You SHOULO || FRANK ,HAO You 
HAVE — DouBLed 3 HEARTS \ {BID 4 SPADES 
FRANK WOULD {17 SHUT OUT 
\ Have MADE \! A sur 
Novw HEeE F OIAMONOS|T Oi CATION 
1s A CASE FBy PARTNER | 
WHERE THE OF NO-TRUMPS 
THiRO HANO |; ! 
Bios OVER A 
NEGATIVE DOUBLE= 


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XVI 


ABOUT THIS LUCK THING 


ONE of the most distinguished bridge players 
I know insists that there is no such thing as luck, 
and asserts that he has no superstitions, yet every 
time, when he wins the cut, he’ll change to the win- 
ning direction. Once when I twitted him about it, 
he said: 

‘That isn’t superstition. That’s just plain fact.” 

And it is a fact. ‘There are times when the 
players who sit east and west will win every rubber. 
At other times the north and south players will be 


~ consistent winners. 


Sometimes the luck seems to follow the cards. 
The holders of the red cards will be the big win- 
ners. At other times luck will seem to follow a 
certain player, no matter where he sits, which cards 
he uses, or who is his partner. 

Bridge players have all sorts of theories about 
luck. A distinguished artist I know maintains that 
everything in the universe runs in rhythm. If you 


83 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


are in rhythm with the fall of the cards, you will 
win. So firmly does he believe this theory that if 
he was sitting with his feet crossed, and was win- 
ning, he would not change his position even if his 
feet went to sleep, for fear of getting out of 
rhythm. 

Frequently, too, you will hear players bewail their 
luck—‘‘Did you ever see anyone who holds such bad 
cards as I do?’”’ Often, too, people will say of a 
player that he or she is “‘a wonderful holder.” 

As a matter of fact, if a record were kept for a 
given period it would be found that everybody 
holds about the same average of aces and kings. 

If four players, fairly equally matched, play a 
series of rubbers, the difference in their score can 
nearly always be traced to errors they have made, 
overbidding, bad leads, doubling at the wrong time. 

When you hear a person say, “I’m a bad holder,” 
it nearly always means he’s a bad player. 

Luck may run in a certain direction for a time, the 
red cards may win for a time, but in the long run, 
everybody holds about equal cards. 

Good players lose less when they have bad cards, 
and win more when they have good cards—and 
that’s about all there really is to bridge luck. 


84 


MY NAME tS 
KALLOW~WILBUR 
H. KALLOW,. 

1 Don’ T PLAY 
BRIOGE VERY 
WELL 


WILL You MAKE A 
. FOURTH AT BRIDGE mR. 
~ | 0OnN'T BetiEeve 
WE VE EVER MET. MY 
NAME 'S BounVDER 


it GtvE You 
My WOoRO OF 
Honor 1M 
NoT A SHARK, 
my Wire SAYS 
Mm ABSOLUTELY 


fvE NOTICED THAT 

EVERY MAN WHO KNOCKS 
_HIs GAME ALWAY TWRNS 

OUT To BE A SHARK 


NOT A CHANCE! WE'RE 
Att FPooR PLAYERS. 
You AND I Witt BE 
PARTNERS IF THAT 
wit MAKE YOU FEEL 
ALITTLE MORE 
ComFoeTtAa BLE 


1G 

/ tm AFEaAr0 NLL 
$Patl YouR. 
GAmeE.1M™ 
ReEALLy A 


NONSENSE! fet BET 
You PLAY A BETTER 
GAME “THAN Tet REST 
OF US. You'RE JusT 
A SHRINKING. LIL 
VioLeT- Haw! HAW! 


NO,REALLY 
(MA POOR 
PLAYER. 


Aa), 
—- 


Y es Ly 


y 


VA 


YouR WiEE SAYS You RE 
A ROTTEN PLAYER, EH? 
Haw! HAW! “eHA’s 
Goop! wy, EVERY 
MAN IS A RotTEm 
PLAYER TO HIS WIFE: 


WELL, 1 THINK 
) ts TRUE tm 
jy CASE 


SAY, You —!1-s¢- FATHEAOD! 

1 DISCARDED A’Seven oF Cues! 
DOESNT THAT MEAM ANYTHING ty 
YOUR. YOUNG LIFE“ ANYONE GuT An 
1DIET WOULD KNOW THAT | WANTED 
A CLus reetuened! WAKE UP ANO 


Tey To OIS CLAY A LITTLE INTELLIGENCE 
(ie Any ! 


_ outst, RASCALS 

You'Re Kind ee npba 
Cardoen a 

WHAT © WELL, Oty FEELING 


DER 


FOR YOU WOULON T 


“Tear wite BE 


HEAVEN'S is be 
mor, You 
vA SPADE ? 


DIAMONDS tt ¢ 
THE FIRST PACE. 


| NEVER EXPECTED 


‘lA DMuwe HO SEE 
qT AnoTHER Cou 


WHAT 1 | DION T LEAD 

A SPADE fF ARE YOU PERFECT 

t NOTICE YOU'RE NOT GETTING FF 

ROUND SHOULOERED CRREYING fF 

AROUND YouR. BRAIN Far! 
{ ONOM'T WAST TO PLAY 

WITH You Anyway! x 


Ss 


SS 


WV" Cy 


oT 


Send 


XVII 


FREAK HANDS 


Four people make up a table of bridge. There 
are in each pack of cards four of the aces, kings, 
queens, and jacks. So an average hand contains one 
of each. There are four suits, so the average 
hand of thirteen cards contains three cards of three 
of the suits, and four of the others. 

But it is seldom that each of the four players has 
an average hand. Whenever that happens, nobody 
is likely to make a bid. Most of the bidding is done 
on five-card or six-card suits, which are common. 

Frequently one of the players will have a freak 
hand, seven or eight of one suit, and singletons or 
none in others. 

Sometimes a hand will be a two-suiter, with five 
or six spades, and five or six diamonds. 

Two-suiters and freak hands often lead to un- 
usually high bidding, but it is well to remember that 
when the cards are so distributed that you have a 
freak hand, one of your opponents is likely to have 


89 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE > 


a freak hand, made up of the suits in which you 
are short. 

When a two-suiter has been indicated . the bid- 
ding, it is dangerous indeed to make a business 
double. Under such circumstances aces that you 
counted as sure tricks are likely to be trumped on 
the first round. 

Freak hands, too, are responsible for “shut-out 
bids,” which someone once defined as “bidding four 
of the suit of which your partner has none.” 

Shut-out bids are dynamite except in the hands of 
very good players. Always consider before making 
a shut-out bid, what will happen: 

If your partner is void in the suit you bid. 

If your opponents overbid you in another suit. 

Before you make a shut-out bid, count your 
losing tricks—and don’t rely on your partner for 
anything, and bid the full strength of your hand at 
once. 


™ 
—— 


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US THROUGH « You REALLY PLAVE D A 


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OUTOWO YouRsece. 


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DRAWN ENTIRELY 
FROM IMAGINATION 


——— 


FLAWLESS GAME FeOoMm STarr To 
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OF THE EXPERTS COLLONT 
HAVE PLAYEO 


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XVIII 


ABOUT SIGNALS 


IN most parts of Europe when they play bridge, 
they do not use signals. Each player leads what- 
ever he feels like, without regard to what his partner 
wants him to do. 

Every once in a while, here in America, you run 
across a player who seems to like the European 
method, and simply will not pay attention to your 
signals. 

Sometimes it is just plain carelessness. You dis- 
card an eight of spades, and sit back hoping for 
your partner to lead through the king-jack of spades 
in dummy. Instead he leads clubs. 

Being only human, you are apt to make a wry 
face. Then he gets a worried look, and says: 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t notice your first discard.” 

There’s only one kind of a partner worse than 
that—the one who always believes his opponent 
rather than his partner. 


93 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


He makes an opening lead of a king of clubs. 
You put on an eight, inviting him to come on. 
Fourth hand, having a lot of clubs, carelessly drops _ 
on a jack. Your partner falls for it and leads — 
another suit, and you having had but two clubs never _ 


do get a chance to get in your little trumps. 


This sort of partner often throws you, too, when | 
the dealer has bid a no-trump. You, sitting fourth — 
hand, bid two diamonds. Your only purpose in — 


bidding is because that is the only suit you want led 


to you. The dealer, with only the ace of diamonds, — 
takes a chance, and goes two no-trumps. Then your — 


partner, confound him, terrified and intimidated, 
refuses to lead your suit. 

To play successful bridge you must watch for 
your partner’s signals. If he discards an unneces- 
sarily high card in any suit, lead him that suit. 

Trust your partner and you'll win more rubbers. 


WHER You LEAD THE Severs 
OF DiAMONO S YOUR FARTHER WHEN MR, WORMOIL 
pas 4, a oo act DISCARDED THE TeEy 
THE EIGHT, TEs, JACK AnD | OF pee ree ‘arhiet ave 
QUEEN, YOU SHOULD HAVE HAVE Known A 

: LED Him THE Four HEARTS To THE 


Stat 

ON THE SECOMO HAND OF - 

RUBBER INONICED wou ONLAROED The ON THE FIRST HAND OF THE THIRD RLEGER 
Sty OF CLUBS ON THE SECOND HEART LEAD. You HELO THE JACK, TEN, Mine , DEUCE OF 
THE EIGHT OF CLUG 5 WAS THE ONLY HIGHER. HEARTS, THEKING, QUEEN, DEUCE OF CLUGS, 
CARD OUT. IF YOU HAG HELO Your Si¥ THE EIGHT, SEVEN, TREY OF DIAMONDS ANO 

WOULD HAVE MADE BoTH YouR. THE NINE, S\¥, FOUR OF SPADE S. You LEAD 
YyouR FourTH BEST IN HEARTS. YOu 


you 
Foue AMO DEUCE OF CLUGS GooD 
SHOULO HAVE LED 


By Tee way, PROFESSOR, 

How MuCH 010 You Wirt t CLEANED UP AM EVEN 

THIs EverinG 7 #50%, WEL, Oot rT 
GEV DISCOURAGED, 
PROFESSOR. 1 LOSE 
MYSELF NOW AND 


XIX 


TRICKY PLAYERS 


IT pays to make a study of the kind of game 
played by each individual you are likely to be pitted 
against at bridge. Some players are obvious, play- 
ing almost mechanically, counting up each hand, 
bidding according to rule. They make wonderful 
partners, but there is little excitement playing either 
with or against them. 

A crafty player adds zest to the game. The 
tradition of the bridge clubs about a player of this 
sort runs to this effect: 

He was sitting fourth-hand, and the dealer had 
bid notrump. The crafty player had seven diamonds 
headed by the ace-king-queen-jack, and also the ace 
of clubs alone. 

Did he bid the diamonds? Not he. He bid two 
clubs, although he had only the singleton ace. The 
dealer, who had the four other club honors in his 
hand, promptly went two no-trumps. The crafty 


97 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 3 


player doubled the two no-trumps. The dealer re- 


doubled. 


The partner of the crafty player led him the 
club he had called for and then he proceeded to — 
make his seven diamonds tricks, setting the bidder — 


600 points. 


To be a crafty player, however, requires expert _ 
knowledge of the game. When an amateur tries — 


unusual methods he usually comes to grief. 


A crafty player sometimes will deduce from the — 
bidding that both his opponents are short of hearts, _ 
and without enough strength in hearts to really — 
warrant a bid, will put in a heart bid just to drive 
his opponents up to a point where he can set them. — 

He’ll watch the fall of the cards and finesse with — 


a nine-spot and get away with it. 


One of his favorite tricks is the backward — 
finesse—when he has the ace of a suit in his hand, 


and the queen is in dummy, he'll lead up to the 


queen, and sometimes in this way he'll trap a 


guarded king. 


But crafty players always run the risk of arousing — 
their partner’s wrath. Sometimes when they make — 


a phony bid to deceive their opponents, their own _ 


partners take them seriously. 
Don’t be too crafty. 


98 


ee ee ee eee 


IT'S PERFEcTay toy! 
TuRm ARouNO AND 
LETS see Howrr 
LOOKS tm BCACK 


OH, MADGE, How 


Do You CiKE My 
New Fue Coar? 


five BEEN THL0 No ONE SHOULD Buy 
FURS WITHOUT TAKING ALONG AN 
ExPERT. ITS SO EASY To Foo THE 


ORDINARY BUYER. ; 


{mM NOT INSINUATING, MY DEAR, THAT YOUR 
COAT tS RABBIT. IT MAY GE MOLE AS You 
Teen iT iS. PM Tus TELLING You WHAT PVE 
HEARD AGOUT FuRs. M1 SURE tm Good 

1ENO OF YOURS 


. QuUGH FR 
cael To SPEAR 
FRANKLY 


WELL, | HOPE You BouGHT TAT 
\: A RELIABLE PLACE. SOMANY 
SHOPS MISREPRESENT THELRFURS 


Y y! ; 
UA i ; 
tUNDERSTAND THEY Cart tmiTATe ANY 
Fue WitH PLAIN, EVERY DAY KAGBIT, 
THey CAN EVEr IVIAKE ATIGER SKIN OUT 
OF Iv THAT WouLd Foot ANYONE : 


LETS PHONE JIM 
ANNO MADGE AND MADGE GABCON'S NAME 


HAVE 'EM Come OVER} (Tp mE AGAIN AS LONG 
AM PLAY BRIOGE AS you tive! t HATE 
THIS EVENING HER! ran 


Zin Ti 


Duo 
“sosepagteme 650 


COGS ALO OS { ) 


Cenc, \ Cys 


XX 


SOME PITFALLS TO AVOID 


IF you consistently lose more often than you win 


_at bridge, there’s only one explanation of it—you're 


not a good player. 
You frequently hear people say: ‘I never have 


any luck at cards,” or “I’m a very poor holder.” 


All that those phrases mean is that the person speak- 
ing is a poor player, and generally is so conceited 
about his game that he doesn’t know it. 

If four people played bridge four hours a day for 
a hundred days and an accurate record was kept of 
the hands each one held, you would find very little 
difference in the distribution af aces and kings. You 
would find, however, considerable difference in their 
scores. In duplicate games where forty people play 
a series of boards where all have the same hands 
there are sometimes widely varying scores. 

If you check back over an evening’s play you will 
find that your losings are largely attributable to your 
own errors, overconfidence in bidding, optimism in 

IOI 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


doubling, or slipping a trick here and there that you 
might have had. 

In order to avoid some of the pitfalls that make 
you a loser, here are some things to remember: 

Be Quick at Arithmetic. 


Always keep count of how many trumps have __ 
been played. Always notice the pips on your part- 
ner’s first lead and try to discover from what he led. 


When it comes to deciding which of your opponents 
to throw the lead to, stop and count up how many 
cards they have left in the suit they bid. If you are 
good at arithmetic and have listened carefully to the 
bidding you ought always when it gets down to 
the last three or four cards to know with fair 
certainty what each opponent still holds in his hand. 

Be a Conservative Bidder. | 

Never open the bidding with a king-jack suit or 
a suit headed by the queen, even if you have seven 
of them. Wait for the second round. 

Of course, if you have compensating tricks, all 
the other aces and kings, you can sometimes take a 
chance, but even then surprises may happen. The 
trumps may all be bunched against you. 

Never bid a no-trump when you have a good suit 
bid in your hand. No trumps are the hardest to 
make. 

102 


(1 NEED SOMETHING 


—— : 1 COME HoMmeE From 
BeivGE? to BAD! Too BAD: ok THE OFFICE AT MIGHT ugetHar. «™ 
GREAT GAME AND A WoN- ALL FAGGED OUT AND UNDER AN AwEuL 
waging Sg x Adighogs a, Seale Di SENOS STRAIN Act TAY 

: UGet ¢ MAY 
ee salad BRLOGE | FEELLUWEA 
NEw MAN, (T'S MIGHTY 


RESTFUL 


Bie cacti gong pe) I pried ene aoa, 
‘ EIGHT AMO OF HEARTS THE JACK, Ten ANO 
NTH On THe 128 a bce SOIT WARE ne St¥ OF CLUBS, THE EIGHT ANDO THREE oF DIAMONGS } 
_ on fog, deuce ce OF HEARTS, ||| Ano THE EIGHT, 31% ANO FINE OF SPADES, 
te doce Goud Se OiaonOd AMO Ure Pune, || HIS Wire HELO THE SEVEN, 3% ArtO THREE OF 
Foug Ano THREE OF SPADES BA cept She i og emma a tN 
THREE OF CLUGS =~ 


TACK, “ OH,Gtaoys! 
| Four tm Not DEAD on 
FIVE AND FOUR OF DIAMONDS AND THE ACE, KING, , oy You Antt ? é 
} QUEEN OF SPADES, My WIFE DEALT AND EID 4 1 HAvEreT oT you 
INOTRUMP AND WE ALL PASSED, BILL LEAO y ; Z) SINCE | WENT 
THE KING OF HEAFTS AMD — \ Ga THROUGH THE 
AS | CENTER WICKET 


D Ly 5 —# 
Mdtuiihddedltdide 


SOME PITFALLS TO AVOID 


Never, when you are fouth-hand, open the 
bidding unless you are sure of going game. Never 
bid a fourth hand no-trumper if you can possibly bid 
a suit. | | 
Be Careful About Doubling. 

Never double three clubs or three diamonds. 
Even if you make the double, it isn’t worth the risk 
of doubling your opponents into a game. 

Never make a business double except on the sure 
tricks in your own hand. Your partner may be a 
liar, and if he lied to you by his bidding, you may 
get set. 

Never make an informatory double without stop- 
ping to consider what your partner is likely to bid. 
Figure out what you will do if he bids your weakest 
suit and one of your opponents double. 

Never make an informatory double without 
having both the major suits well-stopped, for the 
informatory double is generally recognized as a call 
for your partner’s longest major suit, provided he 
has one of four cards. 

Keep Quiet with Bad Cards. 

Don’t, when you are having bad hands, try to 
force your luck. Don’t bid on six to a queen of 
something hoping to drive your opponents up. They 
may double and drive you to destruction. 

105 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


Don’t bid to save game. Don’t bid a major suit 
over an original no-trump. Wait and give your 
partner a chance. 

Anybody who avoids pitfalls here pointed out, if 
they do not become a good player, will at least 
lose less. Nei: 


JACK SOMS 
Br 


LISTEN, AUCeS THE — 
JACKSON S ARE 4 
SHACKS AY BGai0GE 
ANn®O t WANT You To: 
PLAY WITH A tatTtce 
IN TECK cence, 

TONIGHT, PO BE ASHAMED 
To HAVE THEM SEE 
. You 619 FourTs .y 
HANO WrTe ONLY ~ 
Two ANNO A HALF 
Sure TRICKS z 
plea att 


4 “THe 
j SUFFERNS 


/ Now , LUTHER ,WHEN THE 
| PLAYA S 


SUF FERNS 


PLEASE Tey ANO 
ENStBLE GAME, REMEMBER 


THeEy ARe SHARKS AT BRiOGE AND 

IF You PLAY Your. USUAL CHILOTSH 
GAmeE Hey'te GE DISGUSTED AND 
it wWon'T BLAME THEM, 

DON'T OVER BID Amo wHer | 
DOUBLE A SUIT BID OF THREE 
TAKE ME ouT = UNLESS YOU RE 
Post TIVE YOU Can OGFEAT THE 
CONTRACT 


COME OVER THIS EVENING NGS 9 OSS 
Don You 
FoeGceTt To 

WATCH THE 

01S CAR OS 

AS You ALWAYS 

NEGtect 
To Vo 


ANO WANT To ASK You AS A SPECIAL 
FAVOR NOT To RAISE, MY SUIT Bid WHEN } 
YOU ONLY BOLO ONE AND A HALF TRtcks. 
WOULDN'T rT GE A GOOD PLAN Fo 
You To RUN eee te civTce 


OOK OM AUCTION 


EMGBARRA SS 
me BEFORE 


THOSE EXPERTS 


XXI 


UNFORGIVABLE SINS 


HAVE you ever been playing bridge with a nicely- 
gowned woman with manicured hands and perma- 
nently waved hair as a partner, and when you have 
made the lead that seemed best in your judgment, 
had her all at once set her face in wrath? Have 
you had her scream across the table at you in shrill, 
angry tones— 

“What did you lead me that diamond for? 
Didn’t you know I wanted to trump a club?” 

If you ever have had that sort of experience, you 
know what I mean by unforgivable sins. People 
who screech at their partners when something hap- 
pens they do not like, don’t really belong at the 
bridge table. Husbands and wives are particularly 
strong on this “why” business. When they cut each 
other as partners, no wife ever seems able to play 
to please her husband, and vice versa. If they waited 
to talk about it after they got home it wouldn’t be 

108 


a 

Nov Such A GAD HANO, 

PARTNER.) HAD THEIR 
SPADES STOPPED TWICE 

| ANO HERE'S A GOOD LINE 
OF CLUGS IF YOu CA™ CLEAR: 
uP THE Suit, | WOULD HAVE 
HESITATED ABOUT Goins 
TO THREE THOUGH, WHAT 
Do You THINI< ed 


Ye 
“ 


“a 

HOw THEY Live 15 & 
MysTery To ME,.CHARLEY 
ZELLS ME ED CANT POSSIBLY 
MAKE OVER *6,000 A NEAR. 
VET THE DOG STELLA Puts 
ON YouD THiInsie THEY 
WERE MILLIONAIRES OR 
SOMETHING... THEY BOUGHT 
ANEW CAR THE OTHER 


DAY “ 


* SALLY, DID You HEAR 
A@BouT MAUD CALORIE 7 


No? my DEAR! SHE WAS 


LUNCHING WITHA 


ACTOR ONE DAY LAST WEEK 


ANDO WHO SHOULO 


MOVIE 
WALK 


IN ANO S'T AT THE NEXT 


TASLE CUT — ” 


“D1O You SEE HER IN 


THAT COMEDY THE PINK, 


CORSET ? SHE WAS PERFECLY 


ADORABLE In THAT. | DIDN'T 
CARE FoR HER Air ALL IN 
THe CROCODILE TEAR. 


“THE LEAD IS In Du 
PARTNER... DO You 
THE G of HEARTS 
HIGH 1 THINIS” 


MmMy, 
WANT. 
PTHAT S 


71 PICKED UP A DARLING 


“r 
ELINOR WORE A STUNNING 
Gown, tT HAO A CORSAGE 
OF WHITE VELVET BEAOE O 
WITH CRYSTAL ANDO A 
GODET SkIRT OF BLACK 
SATIN BEADED WITH JET, 
SHE LOOKED LIKE THE 
DEVIL In tT 


Fy 


TIP TABLE YESTERDAY AT 
AN AUCTION .'T WouLD 
Cost AT LEAST #50°%2 AT 
Any DEALER'S ANO 1 Got 
ty FoR *6.50. ARE WE 
SET, PARTNER Ff Too BAD, 
PERHAPS ISHOULONT  g, 
HAVE RAISED You. BuTt— 


ad la halttiors rel Rte SP ee tot sates ies men 


UNFORGIVABLE SINS 


so bad. If they even would be as courteous to each 
_ other as they are to the rest of the company, it might 
‘be forgiven. But even the most loving of couples, 
_ over the bridge table jaw at each other and shriek 


questions back and forth, till one or the other gets 
angry and breaks up the game. 

And that’s an unforgivable sin. 

There are other players who hold their tongues, 
who would be horrified if anyone accused them of 


cheating, who nevertheless manage to express their 


displeasure at their partner’s bidding or leads by 


_ wriggling in their seats, by assuming a pained 


expression. 

They’re signalling to their partner just as plainly 
as if they were tramping his toes under the table. 
Seldom have the other players courage enough to 
put them out of the game, although that is what 
ought to be done. 

The distress signals in players’ faces are another 
unforgivable sin. 

In such a category might also be included many 
of the petty little tricks many players resort to— 
peeping into hands if they get a chance, hesitating 
before playing a card to deceive their opponents, or 
when they have only a singleton of a suit led, delay- 
ing and apparently debating which card they shall 

Itt 


WEBSTER’S BRIDGE 


play. It’s almost as bad, too, when players vate 
from the accepted terms of bidding with a 
phrases as “I kick it” for “I double,” “Two — 
JHE DEN for ‘“Two spades,” or “I'll venture one 
no-trump.”’ a 

In most cases when players use such expressions, . 
they merely are trying to be funny. It does sound — 
funny to a stranger who happens to play with them. ~ 
He can’t help wondering if the phrases they use have — 
a hidden meaning that the partner understands and 
he doesn’t. ay 

If you’re going to play bridge, play it with the ‘ 
recognized vocabulary, play it conservatively, and a 
keep your temper. a 

Remember the game is supposed to be an amuse- a, q 
ment. * 


ee 
Samra 


ash aii 
; 
oe} 

Kip aks 


